Family Issues and Intuitive Upgrades: My healing journey continues…

In the last two weeks I’ve had two of the biggest “AH-HA!” moments of my life. I mean they were transformational for me and will make a HUGE difference to my health and happiness on almost every level. I’m keen to tell you about it and to see if in sharing my story I might help you make sense of yours (and to hopefully feel less alone)…

GIVING MY INTUITIVE POWER A MAKEOVER!

Those of you who have been following my blog posts on my own personal inner journey will know that I have been working with Master Energy Healer Stacy Vajta since the end of January this year. I had been struggling to process the intense challenges of the last few years despite leading-edge therapies and love from family and enlightened friends. I had done a lot of inner work and healing but there was so much to process that I could not keep up. I needed help. Opening to a deeper level of help from others is as much a part of my evolution as everything else that is playing out.

The allopathic labels for how my system has responded are: ‘Post-Traumatic Stress Syndrome’ and ‘Chronic Fatigue Syndrome’ (Fibromyalgia). I had the same come up after my Mother died back in 1997 and I experienced a Spiritual Emergency. My Chakras blew open and a tsunami of light flooded my system blowing fuses along the way. It is a breaking open. It’s what my system now does to a lesser degree when faced with transformational challenges or influxes of light (growth spurts!), so I am used to it, I understand it as a spiritual energy process and am totally OK with it. What I can’t do is work through it and rebalance my whole system by myself, this is where working with Stacy has been a total blessing.

Many of you will know I am passionate about ensuring that Spiritual Seekers, Sensitives, Intuitives, Healers, Psychics, Lightworkers and awakening souls remain GROUNDED on this path. In my commitment to down-to-earth enlightened living I had somehow started to stream and process all my cosmic and intuitive downloads via my physical body. I had been acting as a full throttle constant ‘step-down transformer’ (calibrating high frequency energy, bringing it down to a vibrational level we can work with and understand with our minds and emotions and ground with our bodies). Don’t get me wrong, this is what we are here to do, we are meant to act as lightning rods, grounding the light of Source down through us, anchoring it to the earth and then sharing that light via our hearts in the world. BUT I had been taking it to the extreme, my Spiritual Emergency back in 1998 had left my Chakras very open to streaming a LOT of light and it was leading to burn out due to the amount of information I work with and the fact that I was processing it all through my physical body too quickly. Add to that the fact that I have been doing all this while setting up a spiritual business on my own and facing multiple bereavements and countless other shocks and it suddenly makes perfect sense why my body might be having a hard time right now. And all this without even mentioning our collective evolution, awakening or ‘ascension’ symptoms! Phew, this having a body bit can really put us through the ringer.

So, in my recent session with Stacy she helped me to adjust my processing settings so I can ‘read’ and interpret the vast expanse of intuitive information in a gentler way, just touching into the knowing with the outer eges of my energy fields at my own pace rather than having to take it all into my cells! This is a speciality of Stacy’s and I am starting to really appreciate her skill at adjusting those inner settings that make a huge difference to how we experience and process our lives inside and out.

FAMILY ISSUES ON THE SPIRITUAL PATH

My next big “AH-HA!” moment, and this reverberated deep in my soul, came when Stacy helped me become aware that I carry a heavy sense of responsibility for my whole family and their collective enlightenment, even for those who have crossed over! When they were alive I had felt responsible for them and got pulled into the role of carer at a very young age, sowing the seeds of being an ‘over-giver’ in adulthood. Now many of them are in spirit it has shifted slightly (I have done work in this area) but there was still an attachment that needed tweaking. And so we tweaked.

I declared out loud to my step-father recently that the unhealthy and destructive patterns that run through my ancestral line must stop with me. I have always been clear about that, not so much as a decision but as an intuitive knowing. What I didn’t realise is that I had passed this knowing through my early responsibility-bearing ‘carer filter’ and was carrying it for everyone in a way that was unhealthy for me.

I instantly knew what needed to happen and so did Stacy. She helped me shift things before I even verbalised what I was sensing. We helped redirect the energy flow of those family members who were feeding off my energy (across all time and space). Instead of feeding off me as their source of light and transformation, they were now plugged into their own ‘Source -> Earth -> Source’ circuits. Phew, what a relief. I felt my energy instantly lift, like when you’ve been carrying a heavy bag of shopping for ages, you put it down and your arms start to float upwards.

On this path of spiritual transformation many of us out-grow our birth family or family of origin, feeling as if we no longer fit in. Perhaps you never felt you fitted in for whatever reason. If you were adopted it may be the other way around; finding your birth family is what gives you that sense of belonging. Basically it’s about finding your ‘resonant’ family, like-minded people and your soul group. Creating your family of choice is part of growing up not only as individuals but collectively as conscious beings.

It has been a tough road and I have had to let go of a LOT of people who used to be the centre of my world. I held on, working on unconditional acceptance and love but just kept getting bashed over the head. Loving acceptance isn’t quite as easy when in abusive situations and you have to know when to bow out gracefully. I can do the spiritual leapfrog and give you a load of wise platitudes about it but to be honest, for me this process hurt like hell.

That primal, tribal, social pull runs deep in all of us, the need to belong, to be seen and accepted. Breaking away from the pack used to cost lives so the survival response when a family member doesn’t toe the line is strong.

Pain seems to arise when we look for and hope for that sense of belonging, acceptance and validation from the wrong people and places. There is a genuine grieving process when you realise you are shifting vibrationally out of someone’s life, one that must be felt and honoured. For me guilt was always my family’s manipulation tool of choice so that has been one to navigate and overcome as I put my own needs first.

You’d think after ‘losing’ so many people in my life I’d have the hang of this by now but it is a work in progress for sure. Just when I think I’ve come to an authentic place of loving acceptance with my relationship to my family of origin, BAM! along comes something to bring up all those feelings. It is easy to say ‘just love and accept everyone for who they are’ and of course that is the goal and always my intention, but it has to be an authentic journey of growth and heart-opening, it cannot be forced or faked and feelings need to be felt so energy can move and we can reconnect to the love in a genuine way.

Some people find that when they discover their resonant family it greatly enhances their relationships with their family of origin and that is a blessing indeed. That has been my experience in the past. However right now I am attuned to and aware of the challenges in this process shared by many I hear from all over the world, so I am speaking to that.

What I do know is that family issues and breaking away from unhealthy relationships is part of our evolution and it is a pulse surging forth in our collective consciousness right now. We are in a phase of vibrational sorting, ensuring that we are exactly where we need to be and with those people who will help raise us up and allow us to be all we came here to be.

Both of these “AH-HA!” moments have marked important shifts for me that allow me to sit more in my authentic essence. Every challenge is a call further into my power, deeper into my essential self. I have released a heavy load in this latest healing cycle and am now able to access incisive knowing from my ‘wise all-knowing self’ without burning out! Hooray!

What are your experiences with family or personal relationships on this path of spiritual transformation? Do share your story in the comment box below.

Love and blessings,

Kimberley ♥

KIMBERLEY JONES Energy Tools and Soul Skills….for an awakening world

My blog site has now moved to www.kimberleyjones.com Hope to see you there!

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CONTACT: Stacy Vajta – Expanded Pathways www.expandedpathways.com

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♥ SHARING IS CARING: Please rate it, like it and share it! Thank you ♥

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Gloriously Imperfect – Letting go of the ‘Nice Girl’: My healing journey continues…

OK so what has face ache got to do with being a ‘Nice Girl’?

My face has been hurting. My jaw, lower teeth, ear and generally the right side of my head. I had another healing session with Stacy last week where she did some energy work in that area for me. It certainly got some energy moving. I have seen many lists of ‘ascension symptoms’ which feature the pains I speak of. All I know for sure is what I am feeling right now, in this moment with all my senses; my 5th, 6th and enhanced senses.

I try to pay attention to whatever is loudest and right now what is loudest is my physical body, my physical felt sense of what is going on within the boundary of my skin.

As well as the pains around my jaw, teeth, face and ear I’ve also had what feel like small electric shocks all over my body.

I have found it isn’t helpful for me when other people try to tell me what I am feeling or why I am feeling it. When my physical body is shouting it is a wonderful reminder for me that I need to listen to myself, to my own body, to my own intuition and just BE with whatever is going on. The widom of my own body has the answers that are relevant to me and my journey and I must consult my own inner oracle.

So that’s what I have been doing with support from Stacy.

Slowly this week I have become aware of the energy, emotion and information held inside the physical pains I’ve been having. I am feeling it because that energy, emotion and information is now on the move. “Feelings are healings in progress”. Something that has been sat there in my jaw joint (TMJ) is ready to shift and transform.

So I sent up a request to my unseen Team of helpers. I asked for their assistance in becoming aware of and letting go of whatever I needed to let go of in order to be free of this pain. I asked for help in relaxing into the feelings. Help came.

Along with a momentary intensification of the physical feelings came a flood of unspoken truths and unexpressed feelings.

Releasing from my face, jaw and teeth was a stream of old energy and information. It manifested as a stream of multiple flashbacks and spontaneous daydreams of all the times I swallowed my truth or put my needs last in order to be a ‘Nice Girl’.

I witnessed all the times people had disrespected me and I had let it slide because I didn’t want to upset anyone, or been too young to assert myself.  In the out-going stream I saw every time I’d had my spirit squashed by an over-bearing character but kept shtum because I was afraid of conflict. I witnessed many of the times I had put someone else’s needs before my own. It all came rushing through my awareness and I watched it and felt it as it whooshed by like high-speed traffic.

My Nice-Girl-programming was reinforced with violence, aggression and manipulation so it was planted deep. As I am growing and being called to speak my truth as a teacher and leader and assert clear boundaries in the world it is bring up a lot for me to heal and clear about this. That programming is being challenged within me now and of course it also ties into the collective feminine wound of abuse and persecution through the ages that comes up or gets triggered as a woman steps into her power, as well as each month during the monthly cycle (PMS= Clearing/transmuting the feminine pain body).

A pocket of suppressed power energy had built up in my jaw joint, resulting in me grinding my teeth at night and clenching my jaw unconsciously. I am pretty sure that my Nice-Girl-programming has also been behind ongoing weight issues. These issues can apply to the Nice Boy too of course, however I cannot speak from personal experience about how this might be for a boy/man.

Try this quick checklist based on one by Karen R Koenig to see if you have a ‘Nice Girl’ problem:

Circle the number that best describes in general how you think, feel, or act:

1 = Rarely/Never          2 = Sometimes          3 = Often          4 = Always

___  1.  I jump in and take care of family members when others could but don’t or won’t.

___  2.  I feel guilty whenever I say no to family members or disappoint them.

___  3.  I avoid burdening family members with my problems.

___  4.  I put family members’ needs before mine at my own expense.

___  5.  I take care of friends more than they take care of me.

___  6.  I feel guilty and bad whenever I say no to friends or disappoint them.

___  7.  I am there for friends even when they’re not there for me.

___  8.  I put friends’ needs before mine at my own expense.

___  9.  Even though it stresses me out, I push myself to give my all at work.

___  10. I pick up co-workers’/bosses’ slack and rarely get credit for it.

___  11. People at work take advantage of my good and giving nature.

___  12. I stress myself out by saying yes to people when I know I should say no.

___  13. I feel in the wrong and apologize automatically even when I’m not at fault.

___  14. I keep silent about what’s on my mind rather than speak up.

___  15. I feel that whatever I do isn’t enough with friends, family, at work, and at play.

___  16. If I don’t do something perfectly, I feel like a failure.

___  17. I’m mortified when I make mistakes because of what people will think of me.

___  18. I have an overwhelming need for people to like/love/accept/approve of me.

___  19. I avoid making waves.

___  20. I go out of my way not to hurt people’s feelings and end up being dishonest.


What’s Your Score?

Here’s how to score this test.  Give yourself 4 points for each Always answer, 3 for Often, 2 for Sometimes, and 1 for Rarely/Never, then add up your points.

Now look at the chart below and see where your score falls:

60-80 — You are a people pleaser. You are draining your energy and giving your power away. This could make you unwell. Time to be nicer to YOU.

45-59 — You put others before yourself and it is costing you dearly. Martyrdom is not cool.

25-44 — Time to check in and keep an honest eye on your behaviour and beliefs about your own self-worth

20-24 — Being too nice is not your problem.

The energy in my jaw and face is moving and as it moves I am experiencing it as anger. I see it as dark, sludgy red energy coming out of my face. I wasn’t aware of feeling anger at the time of each of the scenarios I speak of above, but anger is usually some degree of helplessness when you get down to it, powerlessness. I had suppressed my power and felt helpless. I was pushing my own needs and feelings to the bottom of the pile. I was not taught as a young girl how to stand up for myself, take care of my own needs or speak my truth in a calm, assertive way. I was taught, largely by example to smile and swallow the feelings. Be a Nice Girl, please others or else. I have also carried a sense of responsibility for healing my family, for being their source of light, which I am now releasing.

Over the top of this dark red energy I noticed another layer of vibrational information that was keeping this healing from flowing as freely as it might. Something was in the way. The Nice-Girl-programming that led me to say nothing in the first place was now keeping me from giving myself permission to feel the full extent of the anger. Nice Girls don’t get angry, right? Or so my system appeared to believe.

Now, many people who knew me from my late teens and early 20s might might not believe that I had any problem speaking my truth. As a carer for my Mother for 11 years through Cancer, I had become incapable of BS and was very out-spoken, largely to protect the crumbling heart that lay behind the facade. But when she died, all that stopped. I didn’t need to be her strength anymore, I didn’t need to keep it together. And so I promptly fell apart.

I digress. The Nice-Girl-programming was keeping me from really being with my feelings and the energy that was on the move, it was blocking its flow. That programming was mainly made up of old fear (fear of violence, fear of disapproval etc) and so I started there. I gently allowed myself to feel the fears that had been instilled in me to prevent me from meeting my needs or answering back in my early years (I made up for it later!), I gently breathed into the feelings. This is very old stuff you see. I have worked on/played extensively with all this over the years so this isn’t a new healing journey for me. It’s just that this week this particular piece of healing is happening and is coming out of my jaw! So I’m going with it.

Incidentally I’ve also noticed that the spiritual path can really plug into the Nice-Girl-programming getting all mushed up with ideas of saintly martyrdom, selflessness and being the angelic, ethereal picture of perfect femininity, kindness and endless compassion. It is an ideal, like the Olympic Gold for those with Nice-Girl-programming and it can be a hard one to ground and let go of. It can also be the one that leads you to burn out. I know that one very well.

My higher self knows that the ‘story’ part of all this is irrelevant, it’s all just energy and energy can change in an instant. However, I feel deeply that my path in this lifetime is to grow, awaken and transform WITH my physical body, embracing my emotions and my humanity. I do not wish to hover above my body seeing everything from my Crown Chakra perspective and judging anything lower than that. I have no desire to transcend the human experience. We are all here to bring heaven down to EARTH, to enjoy every reality and dimension whilst always knowing we are the awareness having the experience. Spiritual beings having a human experience and celebrating every bit of it. Down to earth ascension and every day enlightenment. My shift now is learning how to do that without taking on everything that isn’t mine and trying to process it through my physical body. Something Stacy has really helped me with during our healing sessions.

So when a pain is there I feel it, I allow myself to breathe towards it, to relax into it rather than clench away from it or do a spiritual leapfrog over the top of it. Then it moves and is gone for good. Another deeper piece of the same issue held in my Pain Body may surface later, but for now that bit is done.

Let me just say that of course there is nothing wrong with being a nice person. For me however, being nice was a behaviour forced upon me through fear, a behaviour instilled in me through manipulation (parental and societal) and one placed higher than my own well-being. ‘Nice’ became a replacement for the real me. That is when it is unhealthy, when it is a mask for suppressed pain and keeps men and women from being their TRUE selves or speaking their truth.

As a sensitive, intuitive, empath (INFP) my own health, happiness and well-being depends upon me staying up to date with what I am feeling on every level and being present with what is. In order to do that I had to learn a few years ago to give myself permission to feel and acknowledge my real feelings. That was a breakthrough. These days if I sit on something that needs expressing I feel it in my body as discomfort. When I say “express” that can mean journalling, laying down and breathing, feeling it privately or saying just what needs to be said, to the right person, with the right degree of power in the perfect moment. That last part is what keeps our Throat Chakra (and Thyroid) healthy by the way.

So I have been breathing and just being with the aches and pains in my face and jaw, watching, feeling and allowing. As that old suppressed helplessness and anger releases, so it turns into pure power and love rushes in to fill the space it leaves behind. When old anger first starts to move it can come out a bit messy, that’s OK. Don’t be hard on yourself. Try seeing it as a power surge. Eventually the flow tempers itself and you will experience a new level of personal power, self-esteem and self-respect. The messy part can be done with a healer, a loved one or in your journal; in a safe space.

Nice Girls need to allow their anger to flow when it shows up because it quickly opens the door to authentic intuitive power and a renewed sense of self-esteem. It doesn’t have to be taken out on others, just felt……breathed and felt. Personally I have found those moments when it does all burst out to be some of the most transformational times in my life. When women have a hard time at Menopause, it is often relative to the degree they have suppressed their true self, true needs and true feelings. Hormones more easily stay in balance when we speak our truth, honour our needs and keep our energy flowing. Our Chakras help keep our energy flowing and they also relate to each of our glands and hormones. Our hormones keep our emotions in balance. It is all connected. Keep our truth flowing, our power flowing and look after our own needs at least as well as we do other peoples’ and we have more chance of a graceful monthly cycle and transition post menses.

Generally if like this week I am processing some anger (suppressed power), I try to simply feel and express how I am feeling. I was with my partner and feeling all this stuff bubbling up and it would have been so easy to either swallow it and say I was fine or just spray it all over him, project it onto him or take it out on him. But that doesn’t actually shift the energy, it just makes a mess, which is OK too but not my intention. So I told him I was feeling a lot, I was struggling and needed some space (and hugs too). Instead of hiding my feelings trying to be nice, I let myself be an almighty grump but by myself, just breathing and feeling.

About 10 years ago, one of my male spiritual teachers really helped me with this. He was 30 years my senior, perfect to help me with any Father issues relating to the Nice-Girl-programming I carried. He simply said “You don’t need to smile at me. Only smile if you really feel it, only smile if you really mean it. You don’t need to pretend with me and you don’t need to please me. My ego doesn’t need your smile”. THAT was a transformational moment for me. I had always been known as ‘smiley’, people liked it. It was my mask.

I was free, at least when around him. It was my first taste of unconditional acceptance, the love flowed toward me even when I was outrageously angry, messy and emotional. That was a gift. It gave me the experience of being lovable no matter how I felt. It was contrary to my programming.

So whatever I am feeling now, when I can unconditionally allow and accept it all and love my own truth, when I can sit with it unafraid to feel it, not try to fix it, suppress it or judge it….then it liberates me and I can offer that space authentically to others. I only react to other people expressing their feelings if I am not giving myself full and loving permission to do the same. It wouldn’t have been that long ago that even reading this kind of blog would have pushed my buttons because I wasn’t giving myself permission to be this authentic. We can’t love ourselves fully if we are concerned what others think of us or if we are trying to live up to some unrealistically perfect, spiritually sanitised standard constantly seeking approval from others or more ‘likes’, Facebook friends, glowing comments and ‘shares’!

I am a number 2 on the Enneagram, a ‘people pleaser’. I used to try to please from a place of fear and lack. Now I am growing to a place of doing so rather from a place of LOVE and fullness.

When we love ourselves for ALL that we are, on every level of consciousness and we are no longer afraid of our deepest feelings (our own shadow) then we can enjoy freedom to express the fullness of ourselves and be authentic and it becomes possible to love others in all their messy and glorious imperfection too!

Love and blessings,

Kimberley ♥

KIMBERLEY JONES
Energy Tools and Soul Skills….for an awakening world

My blog site has now moved to www.kimberleyjones.com Hope to see you there!

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

CONTACT:
Stacy Vajta – Expanded Pathways
www.expandedpathways.com

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

♥ SHARING IS CARING: Please rate it, like it and share it! Thank you ♥

The Way Back to LOVE: My healing journey continues…

Our relationships with others are often a reflection of aspects of our relationship with ourself and our life.

One of the most common issues clients and readers have asked me about over the years is their love life.
“How can I find my Soul Mate, my True Love?”
“Why do I keep ending up with the ‘wrong’ person?”

There are very effective Law of Attraction tools as well as the common guidance I have given to others myself many times and that is to love yourself first, wholly and completely, everything else flows on from there.

But what does this mean in real everyday life experience? How does our inner world and those parts of ourselves left unseen influence our ability to love ourselves fully or attract the kind of love and life we deserve?

As you may know from my previous post The Art of Falling Apart, I am having regular healing sessions with Master Energy Healer Stacy Vajta. I was recently diagnosed with Chronic Fatigue, Adrenal dysfunction and other things which all basically shout: “It’s transformation time again Kimberley. Time for a rest, time to go deeper and time for a growth spurt”.

My ‘homework’ for this week from Stacy has been to love my body more by welcoming my Body Deva or Body Consciousness into my full awareness. I am to love it and pamper it as I would a beloved guest of honour.

So I have been connecting with it as if it were a being in its own right, I have been imagining what my Body Consciousness ‘being’ might look like and what I might say to it.

What would YOU say to your Body Deva if it appeared before you as a wise and separate being?
What would yours need to hear?
What would it need to say to you?

Love your body more and you will get well. Right?

I read it all the time, in newsletters, Facebook posts, blogs, articles and books: “Love yourself and you will find optimum health, true love and life balance”.

What I am realising is that loving myself now doesn’t look quite how it did when I was consciously seeking to love myself several years ago. Back then it certainly worked for me in terms of getting well and then attracting my Love Mate. Excuse me as I digress for a moment and tell you more about that…..

9 years ago I would say I was at my best health-wise, everything was flowing, I felt balanced, I was fit, healthy, happy and grounded. This was after 2 years in semi-retreat where I focussed pretty much exclusively on spiritual contemplation, self-healing and self-care. I was surrounded by healers and teachers who helped me rebuild my strength day after day. After 27 years of stress and trauma I really needed it. I needed that time to heal and discover who I really am. During this period, one of the things I did was plant seeds of intention about my dream partner, my love match, my spiritual twin. I visualised him, dreamed about him and wrote about him in the back of my journal. Then I let go and got on with my life. I didn’t long for him or pine for him, I simply let go, trusted and got on with healing and learning to love myself.

Then one day I did something seemingly unrelated, I looked up old school friends on ‘Friends Reunited’ and sent some emails to see what everyone was up to. Back came an email from a guy I’d sat with in ‘A Level’ Art (age 17/18 yrs) some 10 years earlier. He was living near my home town, so the next time I was back visiting family in Devon we went to the pub for a drink. He met me from my Nan’s house where I was staying. I had an instant sense that I may have just met ‘the one’ I had been writing about, but I played it cool, not wanting to imprint my visions onto the wrong person or get ahead of myself.

It was clear from pretty early on that this tall, dark and handsome man (yes really) was the man I had written about in the back of my journal. He was even wearing the same clothes I had seen in my vision of him! Whether I created this or found it (or both), Neil is indeed my Love Mate, a soul mate who helps me grow through loving kindness and an unending gentle love and acceptance that has transformed how I see myself and the world. He has helped me begin to see the places where I do not love myself as much as he loves me.

So getting back to my earlier thread…recently this learning has come up again, with my homework from Stacy inviting me to love my Body Deva.

Like any slightly dysfunctional relationship, issues are rarely resolved simply by deciding to be nice to each other. The truth of the feelings that are really there bubbling under the surface need to be addressed, faced, felt and possibly expressed in order to return to truth and to make space for love to flow again.

So as I was inviting my Body Deva into my awareness as an honoured guest and imagining placing her at the head of a lovingly adorned dinner table, I became aware of the fact that it didn’t feel authentic. This exercise was helping to reveal my true feelings and they weren’t pretty.

I was angry. I didn’t actually want to give my Body Deva the time of day let alone an honoured place at my imaginary banquet. I was totally P.O’d and I didn’t know why. These feelings took me by surprise. But I tried to just allow them to be there and watched them with curiosity. This all happened last Sunday morning from under my duvet, the feelings surged forward as I was waking. As I had woken up, my homework had drifted into my consciousness and I imagined my Body Deva as my honoured guest at dinner. I was furious.

Instead of resisting the feelings and trying to stick to the plan of what I thought was loving my Body Deva, I allowed myself to breathe and feel all the anger as it surfaced (a different way of loving myself). I let myself just BE with what was happening in that moment. There was no judgement, clever analysis or spiritual platitudes, I just felt it. Having tried dozens of healing modalities, lifestyle changes and special super-nutrition eating plans, what it came down to was just feeling the energy that was there beneath the surface and had previously been buried too deep to access.

What I realised is that I was feeling old anger toward my body, anger that goes back 12 years to when I was seriosuly ill for the first time in my life. I was 27 years old and disabled by what stress and trauma had done to my body. I did a lot of self-healing back then as part of integrating my Spiritual Emergency of 1998 but I don’t think I had really connected with the anger, disappointment, helplessness and frustration I felt towards my body for what I saw as it letting me down.

At 27 years of age I had felt betrayed by my body. Here I am now with similar but much milder symptoms. They are showing me where these unresolved feelings have been sitting, waiting to be acknowledged and brought back into the field of loving acceptance.

If you feel hurt, betrayed or let down by a family member, you won’t heal it by papering over the cracks and trying to be nice to each other. The pain will be sitting beneath the surface influencing and colouring every interaction with that person and affecting your own well-being. Those true feelings, whatever they are need to be met if you are going to move on and if love is going to have a chance of flowing again.

If having tried everything there is simply no way to sort things with some people, we can let them go (in love) or at least take some serious time out. With our bodies obviously we cannot do that, we are committed!

This is what I felt bubbling up inside me last Sunday morning, the feeling of being trapped in a room with no doors or windows with someone who has betrayed me, hurt me and let me down. I felt like screaming. This is apparently a common feeling for those suffering chronic illness or disability but I had not connected with the intensity of these feelings 12 years ago so there they sat in my energy body creating unhealthy patterns. These patterns have at times caused me to push my body, disconnect from it, ignore it, over-give and work too hard. All the while in recent years my body has got bigger and bigger and the symptoms worse and worse as my body tried to get my attention.

So now I am listening, really listening thanks to Stacy. I am opening to an honest dialogue with my Body Deva, I am open to healing that relationship and am taking my time to do this authentically. It is an important step on my way back to love for my physical self and full health. The bigger picture is that this is ultimately part of my being able to ground more in my physical vessel and be a more effective conduit for Grounding the Light and being that interface of spirit and matter that defines the human/spiritual experience.

It really is just the beginning of a new healing cycle and I’ll keep you posted.
If you can relate to anything I have shared in this post please share your story by posting a comment below. I’d love to hear them.

Love and blessings,

Kimberley ♥

KIMBERLEY JONES
Energy Tools and Soul Skills….for an awakening world
My blog site has now moved to www.kimberleyjones.com Hope to see you there!

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CONTACT: Stacy Vajta – Expanded Pathways www.expandedpathways.com

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The Power of Giving Thanks

To all my friends celebrating gratitude today let me wish you a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Here is a message sent to me by a beautiful friend that I felt moved to share with you all to, celebrating this and every day as a day of giving thanks.

Much love to you all,
Kimberley ♥

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The qualities of Gratitude and Thankfulness can lead you to a pure heart. They change the energy fields, within and around your body, and transform your mental state by lifting your vibrational frequency.

The American celebration of Thanksgiving draws higher ideals into the forefront of people’s thoughts; the ideal of family and joining together in love, the ideal of abundance and the bounty that is possible and most importantly, the ideal of giving thanks.

When one is in the state of giving thanks there is such an elevation in consciousness that all appearances to the contrary begin to drop away. A sense of gratitude creates a high frequency of energy that is akin to a loving embrace from the Universe. There is proof that gratitude can actually change your brain chemistry.

Giving thanks can become a sacred act that calls forth all the assistance needed for you to feel supported and cared for in this life. Sharing whatever one has is a part of the ideal behind Thanksgiving celebration. The creation of sports events and shopping days are modern distractions from the original intention of a day set aside for loving kindness and thankful prayers of gratitude for all that one has in life.

Even when life may not have demonstrated for you the ideals you hold for bounty, there are still things you can find to be grateful for. With this act those small pockets of gratitude build into a full life demonstration. Most of the demonstration however comes with your happy mental state that builds strength as you realize all the many ways you are being cared for by the benevolence of God’s Grace.

An ever-changing life begins with your focus of attention, as well as your intention to live within the sacred heart of gratitude. When you can love what is, the void spaces begin to fill with Light. Filling all the empty spaces in your life with Divine Light creates a frequency of abundance and fullness. Your heart begins to feel full of love and creative opportunities begin to reveal themselves in miraculous ways. Suddenly there seems to be more and more to be grateful for, and the sacred vessel of your being becomes purified with the Light of your Gratitude and Joy.

Every thought, every breath can open the way for clear light to bring purification into your being. Your willingness to bring greater Light and the art of Thankfulness into your being allows you to become a pure vessel to hold the Truth of your Divinity.

Begin with the tiniest awareness and when you bring your gratitude to this, change occurs. Be grateful that you don’t have to tell your lungs to breathe and your heart to beat, and all the other miraculous ways your body serves you. Be grateful that there are trees bringing oxygen and water to the Earth and absorbing carbon. Be grateful for all the beauty and power of the ocean and the great lakes and rivers that nurture us so beautifully.

Begin anywhere and the act of Gratitude will change your life for the better. Here is a suggestion for Thanksgiving prayers.

Divine Presence:

Thank you for the many gifts you have brought into my life. Thank you for my heart that beats with your love, and this miraculous body that serves me so I may serve you on this Earth. Thank you for new ideas and opportunities that are revealing themselves to me every day. Thank you for the beauty of this Earth and the bounty that the Earth provides. Thank you for those who care about me and bring joy and love into my life. Thank you for showing me how much I am loved and for giving me ways to give love.

Let my body hold the force of Gratitude in every cell and let that awaken me to your Presence. May I see your gifts in every moment and be grateful for all that I am given, no matter what it looks like. Let me respond in gratitude to ever situation knowing that my soul’s awakening depends on my responses. As Gratitude fills my being, help me to flow the energy of love and thanksgiving into the world. I give thanks for the growth my Soul receives from the challenges of my life on Earth.

At the center of my being, I know all is well. For this and all my gifts, I say thank you, thank you, thank you.

May this time of Thanksgiving fill your heart with new awakenings to the loving presence within all things and bless every area of your life with pure gratitude.

And so it is.

From www.thegabrielmessages.com

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Kimberley Jones – The Energy Whisperer
My blog site has now moved to www.kimberleyjones.com Hope to see you there!

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A Psychic Attack & A Beautiful Healing

 

Woah the wasps have been driving me up the wall! Talk about a test of surrender & tolerance. Of course I try to acknowledge the blessing, the message & the totem but to be honest right now….TOTEM SCHMOTEM!!

I’ve been triggered big time, so whilst doing my best to breathe through & process these feelings I am also being re-triggered every time one of the little buzzers flies towards me!

Sometimes you have just got to get mad. We spiritual types tend to over-think our feelings, going into our heads & hearts to be kind, wise & insightful when a lot of the time we just need to let go & FEEL. So that’s what I’m doing. No offense but I don’t want to hear any more about what they symbolise I just want them to buzz off!

 

So what feelings have been triggered for me & why are they overwhelming?

Well, to start with I know they are old feelings, energy from the past held somewhere within me as energy, something I am being called to heal at a deeper level. The dominant feeling is fear but wrapped around that is a helplessness & feeling of having my boundaries & personal space invaded. That’s it. That’s the main feeling, of being ‘invaded’.

So I asked myself: “At what other times in my life have I felt this way?”

Last year we had a difficult time with a neighbour who was an overt ‘boundary breacher’ in every way you can imagine, to the point where it started to feel abusive, in other words my usual power to respond, assert & protect was crushed. Luckily he was asked to move on after a few months. What a relief.

A few years ago I had a boyfriend who was mentally unwell & behaved in the same intense, invading way to the point that I was a hollow shell. I had never been so empty. I spent 2 years in retreat building myself back up after that one.

 

So these past few days with the wasps/hornets have brought up the same feelings. None of my usual approaches, responses, tools or practices are making a difference. I simply feel exposed, vulnerable, helpless & am fearing being attacked (or stung) no matter how much I allow the fear in order to heal it.

I am throwing every affirmation & beautiful healing practice at this to raise my vibration out of the fear but still I can feel that my dominant emotion & current vibrational output is fear.

Cosmically & at the soul level I am being given a chance to feel, heal & transform a huge amount of fear, all the fear that has held me back from growing bigger in my life & work. So that’s fantastic . I know on this path of light we need to feel & heal our fear & that sometimes we feel that of others (hugs to my fellow empaths!).

 

Despite my best efforts, this is the signal my vibrational output carries at the moment:
“I fear being attacked, I think I’m going to be attacked”.
 

So guess what happened. Yup, I was on the receiving end of a psychic attack on Facebook from someone I don’t know. Ouch! I attracted it. I magnetised it because of the frequency I was emitting. Like attracts like in this case.

Shortly afterwards I saw on Twitter that Stephen Fry (well-known & much loved British writer, television presenter & all round genius) was on the receiving end of something similar. How he responded allowed me to calm & settle into my body. It was wonderful. His response to the foul language levelled at him was simply:

“But……you don’t know me”

That was it. Simple & without any energetic charge.

 

 

 

A BEAUTIFUL HEALING:

That night as I lay unable to sleep, a male voice shouted “BOO!” in my left ear as though to make me jump. I checked & it wasn’t my partner, he was asleep. Again there I was feeling afraid & invaded, concerned about a boundary breach on another dimension. Immediately I called on my guides, angels, loved ones in spirit, the Christ light & anything else that sprang into my heart.

The energy didn’t feel good so I knew I needed some help from the other realms. What appeared around me were four white tigers & four dragons. I was placed inside a beautiful golden cocoon & bathed in white light. I felt safe.

 

Next I was overwhelmed by a deep feeling of loss & grief for all my loved ones that have died & found myself sobbing into my pillow. I felt loved & held but deeply sad.

Slowly I became aware of images on my inner screen of each one of these loved friends & family members that have crossed over. We were sitting together around a large wooden table in the garden of a bar, the sun was shining & it felt SO good to be with them. I decided to ask them for help & for whatever I REALLY need right now to see me gracefully through my healing & transformation.

 

One by one each of them placed a glowing orb of energy into a bowl of water in the middle of the table. They told me these orbs of light were pieces of me & my energy that I had sent with them when they crossed over & they were handing this energy & power back to me now as I needed it. At once the feelings of grief deepened as I realised in receiving this energy back I was in fact letting them all go.

I allowed myself to feel that for a while & sobbed some more. Then I was given the ‘knowing’ that I needed to drink from the bowl of water they had each placed the orbs of energy into. So I lifted the bowl & drank from the glowing, shimmering water. Instantly I felt a strengthening within me.

I drifted off into a peaceful sleep….

Love & blessings,

Kimberley 
My blog site has now moved to www.kimberleyjones.com Hope to see you there!
 
 
 A BIT MORE!! Just last night I was visited again by spirits, stray souls & powerful energies. They kept me awake, insisting on my attention. What was interesting is that I was not even slightly afraid & knew exactly what to do from a calm, loving & assertive place. The wasps & the earlier psychic attack had brought so much fear up to the surface to be healed that I could deal with this otherwise terrifying experience very calmly & effectively. Amazing!
 
I approached the dark tunnel they were stuck in & scattered each spirit with fairy dust, angel sparkles of love. Basically the energy of love. I had to go for something really loving, fun & feminine as both of these spirits were male & were in pain. They were trapped in their own misery & needed to forgive/be forgiven & loved in order to be set free from their own prison of shame & guilt.
 
One broke down in tears. The others fought me for a few moments & then surrendered. Two beings of light emerged in the tunnel either side of them & lovingly guided them towards a brilliant light.
Job done. And so it seems my work of ‘Psychopomp’ begins again! 

 

 

SHARING IS CARING!
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Being Real in Order to Heal…My healing path deepens

 

 

Following on from ‘Quantum Healing & the Wounded Feminine’……

 

When I realised I was facing a new health challenge recently I was also confronted with a dilemma, whether I would go public with my diagnosis of Endometriosis.

The way I teach (& have always worked) is by sharing my own story & experience. This appears to fly in the face of the tightly monitored ‘transference’ boundaries of health professionals, counsellors & psychotherapists, even most coaches.

So did I want to share this with everyone? Would I continue to try to do everything by myself whilst serving so many others? Did I have the strength to face this new health issue without what could be loving support? Was I willing to take the risk? The truth is I wasn’t sure.

 

I was raised by a stoical (highly psychic) mother who did everything herself & battled through pain. I however was born very sensitive as well as psychic. I tried to adopt her ‘battle on regardless’ ways which were & still are to a large extent rewarded by our fast paced society, but I am different & it has taken me many twists & turns on my own path to realise that the ‘stiff upper lip’ just isn’t me!

In opening up & writing my Facebook Note asking for healing & telling you all about my diagnosis I was laying myself open & vulnerable & it was scary. What resulted was a huge wave of love & offers of help (Thank you all SO much). That was it, I was convinced, this new transparent way of working comes naturally to me so I knew finally it was time to bring this authenticity front & center in my life & my work.

 

The result was TEAL – Transparent & Emotionally Authentic Leadership.

TEAL will form the guiding core of my work & how I do it. I hope to inspire this way of working & living in others. I will teach others by demonstrating it myself, I will inspire TEAL in others through inspiration & open communication.

(The colour TEAL incidentally is the colour of spiritual guidance & teaching, emotional healing, protection, uniqueness, trustworthiness & devotion)

For me this is the basis of a new feminine way of working & governing, one that is authentic, open & holistic.

 

 

I have worked many different jobs at many different levels over the years & I usually knew it was time to go when I heard the words: “Don’t bring your personal issues or feelings to work”.
I just couldn’t split myself apart like that, certainly not for a job that was just a job to me.


Emotions are a healthy sign of Energy in Motion – E-MOTION
! people who are scared of their own emotions usually try to judge & suppress them in others. Emotions are the key that unlocks our soul & its messages to us. Emotions can heal physical pain. Unblocked anger can heal depression. Feeling & accepting jealousy can rebuild self-esteem.

FEELINGS ARE HEALINGS IN PROGRESS.

I am passionate about this because every time I see someone judge or suppress an emotion I see them lose a little piece of themselves, burying it deep perhaps not finding it again until a physical condition forces them to go within & do some emotional spring cleaning (the process I’m in at the moment).

For many years I offered intuitive ‘energy scans’ to my clinic clients. I showed them the coloured energy of their pain & memory bodies, stored information held in their bio-field. Very often as soon as a client became conscious of the energy & its associated memory or habitual belief we could transform it easily together with simple breath, healing & awareness techniques plus energy-specific mantras. My clients experienced lasting change, a change in how they felt & reacted & a new sense of empowerment to manage their emotional energy in the future.

Here is an example of a ‘before & after’ energy scan I did several years ago: Energy Map – before & after

I no longer see clients in person, in fact I no longer need to. I use the same abilities to offer helpful guidance & energy skills in the E-Video Readings I now offer.

 

 

Our culture needs to allow space for emotional power, expression & a healthy way of being with those who are feeling these emotions. Getting into the story, drama & engaging in negative agreement when someone is sharing their feelings only re-energises the wound.

Similarly, believing the story of our emotions as they come up only sends the energy that was seeking release nose diving back into our energy fields to be triggered later by something totally unrelated.

 

 

 

I believe emotion can arise before & even without thought. Psychologists William James & Randolph Cornelius agree. Our thoughts can create chemical or electrical reactions within us. Repeated thoughts create neural pathways in the brain that can make that thought habitual (remember reciting the alphabet over & over at school?)

Repeated thoughts or beliefs also create a stored ‘cloud’ of coloured energy in our energy fields that can be triggered unconsciously. Strong buried emotions held in place by habitual, unconscious beliefs or thoughts from early wounds or painful times in our life are what form the ‘pain body’. Our pain body can be triggered by anything in the present moment that is close in vibration to the original event, wound, moment of ‘implantation’.

When pain body/memory body energy is triggered we feel emotion as sensation in our body, our mind may interpret the sensation as a particular emotion. We might not even be aware that our emotions are always accompanied by a physical sensation.

This triggered energy that is interpreted by the brain (which is always seeking meaning & a reason) will often look outwards blaming a person or situation. Emotion often appears to come from nowhere, not make sense & seem like an overreaction to the triggering event. This is because it is old energy bursting out to be cleared. It is an opportunity for healing. What most of us do however is judge this, project it, analyse it, bury it or medicate it. We are commonly afraid to just feel it & allow it to be.



I admit it. We are in our infancy as far as Emotional Intelligence & Emotional Literacy are concerned but we are getting there
. Two psychotherapist friends of mine are the pioneers of Emotional Literacy for Children & developed the only Masters Degree course for the subject. This emotional awareness is entering the school system in the UK. Baby steps, but it is happening.

TEAL – Transparent & Emotionally Authentic Leadership is something we can practice in our every day lives. It is about each of us standing up for the right to be authentic in our lives, relationships & jobs. If people feel uncomfortable about that then that is their stuff. Our world can only benefit by learning more compassion & understanding.

The amount of suppressed energy that would be transformed by a culture of emotional transparency would be AMAZING! Creativity could flow, confidence levels would rise & we would feel more connected to ourselves & each other. Doesn’t that sound like a world you’d want to live in?!

So as I take this day by day, allowing my authentic truth to be expressed I face new fear & after new fear. The healing continues…..

With love & blessings,
Kimberley

My blog site has now moved to www.kimberleyjones.com Hope to see you there!

Here is a video I created to show people what my new ‘Vibrational Videos’ are like (part of my E-Video Readings). However in the process I realise I created a healing video for myself!


If you like this please feel free to rate it, ‘like it’, comment below, share it & quote from it on Facebook & Twitter!

(Teal Lily by www.lucyart.co.uk)

Quantum Healing and the Wounded Feminine – My journey continues…

 

 

Following on from my blog post: ‘How Am I Healing Myself?’…..

 

Hi there friends,

Thanks so much for all your messages of love & support on my new journey of healing. I appreciate YOU! I am so blessed to be able to share this journey with you.

Let me bring you up to date with what’s going on…..

 

My recent diagnosis of Endometriosis required me to look again at every aspect of my life. It is a call to step up a level, go within, change something. I take a physical condition as a very clear sign that my soul is trying to get my attention. SOMETHING needs looking at. Old wounds need healing, old feelings need feeling. I might not be conscious yet of all that is sitting there in my ‘pain body’ waiting to be transformed but I AM committed to the process of discovery.

 

My power, potential & purpose is constantly seeking expression & space in my life. I see my life as a series of taps on the shoulder to create space for it to emerge or to get out of its way. Sometimes it has been hell on wheels! What I trust is that I ALWAYS get to the higher/deeper message, learning & healing…….eventually!

 

What my current health condition is showing me is how to treat myself as a woman. It has revealed to me how I deny how much I really know, how I play small & keep a large portion of my abilities hidden. I am also realising how I have allowed others to determine how much (or little) I value my unseen energetic contribution to every situation I am in. Why?

 

Well, as I am going deeper into my body’s wisdom it is showing me why. It is showing me through flashbacks & emotional upsurges that relate to every moment since a very young child that I was squashed, overpowered, disrespected, mocked or abused as a sensitive, intuitive & creative female. It is showing me how I kept quiet about what I intuitively knew in order to keep others happy & not threaten their egos.

 

I am realising that I still carry fear about really going public & being fully seen in my absolute power, knowledge & wisdom. There is a fear of judgement, ridicule, being discredited, considered mentally unstable etc. Take a look at that list. Those are all things that have happened to women with ‘power or powers’ over the years (centuries). In fact at points I am aware of what seems like a totally irrational fear of death. This is a whisper from the collective pain body of all intuitive women who indeed lost their lives for having abilities that threatened the Church & other power bases. It’s a very strong feeling & one I could easily mistake for my own (rather than historical/collective).

 

I realise I’ve been waiting for the world to change to one of respect & awareness before I come out into my full power, as though waiting until it is safe to come out of hiding, when in fact I must show myself in order to help affect that change!

 

I spoke quite recently to an influential man who is considered pretty conscious, awake & intelligent who was referring to “those crazy psychics”. For years I have allowed such ignorant comments to close me down & send me into hiding, tucking my power & truth under my arm, planning to save them for a time when perhaps the world is more awake, aware & kind. There are still so many stereotypes & prejudices to bring into the light.

In this instance I was taken so by surprise that I said nothing. Doh! What was great however was that I didn’t close down, in fact I felt myself expand in response. It was his limited belief & I was nowhere to be found within his prejudice. I didn’t take it personally in that moment, not even a flicker. That is progress for me!

I grew up in a psychic family where it was natural to know things, I didn’t realise other families weren’t the same & I had no idea that there was a stereotype or prejudice about people with enhanced senses…ignorance was bliss, in fact it was just our ‘normal’.

 

As my power is emerging it is riding on the back of suppressed anger. I know as someone who has been through smaller cycles of this before that this is healthy & normal. Anger is the fire that cracks the surface so buried power can flow again. The free-flow is what will bring my body back to balance & allow my authentic power to sizzle into my life. The anger is OK, it is just energy, dark red as I see it. If I can be with it, accept it, breathe into it, allow it, even love it, it will transform into pure power.

 

This deep collective feminine (& largely female) wound that goes back thousands of years is bubbling to the surface in our society NOW, crying out to be healed. This world needs those feminine powers & energies that have been repressed. I’m not talking about bra burning & man-bashing here. I love men. I am talking about a distortion of truth & a collective fear that affects us all as we seek to step into our authentic power & create a more compassionate, creative & conscious world.

 

My personal  healing is part of a collective healing of all wounded feminine power. The old masculine ‘destroy & control’ paradigm of power is crumbling. A new heart-centred, humane, creative, intuitive way is emerging. Part of our transformation highlighted by 2012 is about loving & nurturing ourselves, listening deeply within & honouring those feminine aspects. In reconnecting & healing this within ourselves we are doing so for Mother Earth, for all women & all people.

 

 

So what is my Quantum healing technique? Well, it’s a process really. I started with an awareness that my diagnosis had brought up emotions & intuitive ‘knowings’.

Next I really allow myself to drop into those feelings & I breathe into them, giving them space to be there. Each time I get a surge of emotion I find the sensation of it in my body & breath into the centre of it until it dissolves.

Then I go within, I meditate & get really still & quiet inside. I have an ability which many people have & that is the ability to ‘tune into’ the IS-NESS, the pure space of potential & possibility, the empty stillness that rests before anything comes into being whether that be a thought or a word or an action. It is a state of expanded consciousness & space. You simply rest in a space of no-thingness. This is what some people call the ‘Quantum Field’ or the ‘Field of Infinite Possibility’.

I can access it by expanding & going ‘outwards’ or I can access it by going inwards whether right into the eye of the storm of a strong emotion or via a physical visualisation that takes me deep into the cells, molecules & atoms of my body until I reach the place where there is only energy & IS-NESS!

From this place I can choose new thoughts, new realities & send new energy messages into my cells just by using my imagination & intention. I followed this process recently, going deep into my left ovary or more specifically the 5cm blood-filled cyst that had been discovered there on a scan. I went in & sent burst after burst of new energy & light into the cells like Harry Potter zapping someone with his wand! I was re-writing the coding if you like, changing the colours & the story that my body was holding right down deep at the vibrational level.

I then came back to my usual waking state of consciousness & have been reciting mantras & healing affirmations of perfect health to help embed & stabilise the new energy & beliefs in my body, bio-field & brain wiring.

 

This Quantum/energetic/heartmind approach is the one that feels most natural to me but I’m also shifting my diet & reviewing my environment to make sure I’m giving my healing the best chance.

In 6 months I plan to have another scan & intend to discover the ovary is healthy & clear of any cyst & that all traces of Endometriosis have completely gone! Your continued healing thoughts & visions & intentions for my perfect health are SO gratefully received. None of us can do this alone. Thank you so much.

Love & blessings,

Kimberley x

COMING NEXT! – ‘Being Real in Order to Heal’ – How I am healing myself & giving birth to a new form of leadership just by being more open, transparent & speaking my truth…

 

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My blog site has now moved to www.kimberleyjones.com Hope to see you there!